Saturday, October 18, 2008;1:52 PM
Ytsd night, I ransacked my drawer juz t find tht note(s) you gave me previously. I was mre than determined t discard'em in a fury previously & I'm thankful I didn't bcos I think I'd have shoot myself t death if I did ; it still meant alot t me. Even tho I've put you behind now, th past will still remain ; be it whether they were nasty memories or beautiful memories, they are still precious. I still can't believe I could rmb almost every significant text you sent ; could even recite'em backwards up. I thought aft it all, I've forgotten abt th past, but I apparently haven't. I think I can try for my entire lifetime, but th past will always be etched in my brain, but no, not in my heart anymre tho (;
Whtever tht's lost is always th best bcos you can nvr get it back agn.
Anw,
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溏心風暴之家好月圓-Moonlight Resonance
This HKong drama recommended by Lithium square is simply fantabulous. Parents been wantin t watch this a gazillion yrs ago but they had t wait for my EOY t end be4 we can watch tgt, so aye, I knw I'm a lil slow t watch. Watched till ep6 currently but alr teared like crazysh1t. Those who watched th show would und. why. But seriously, watch if you haven't ok! It's definitely mre > worth ur time :D
Anw,
.
.
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溏心風暴之家好月圓-Moonlight Resonance
This HKong drama recommended by Lithium square is simply fantabulous. Parents been wantin t watch this a gazillion yrs ago but they had t wait for my EOY t end be4 we can watch tgt, so aye, I knw I'm a lil slow t watch. Watched till ep6 currently but alr teared like crazysh1t. Those who watched th show would und. why. But seriously, watch if you haven't ok! It's definitely mre > worth ur time :DTh distance btwn us, it's seemingly widenin, so far apart it feels like we were frm different worlds. Does she or whoever it might be now, mean tht much t you? Mre than everyth we shared in th past so much so tht you seemed t have forgotten th past. I still rmb, vividly, every single detail, but u thought I don't tht's all. You feel like a stranger t me now. Sometimes, I no longer feel like confidin or even talkin t you, bcos you feel a million miles away from me. I thought we'd nvr drift apart, I THOUGHT. I was so naive, SO NAIVE t have thought this way. I should've long knwn you'd nvr stay for long. Smth juz don't feel right nowadays, tho IDK wht. We aren't spendin time w/ one another like how we used t. We seem t be close still, but it's all on th surface. T me, your heart's w/ her ; she's who you genuiniely wish t be w/. You, you're juz trashin me arnd, violatin me, insultin me, mockin @ me yet I put up w/ all ur crap bcos I still wanta retain this f/s ; Bet you've nvr realised this. Sometimes, you ask why I was upset, whether I was angry w/ you, I'd be lost for response, unsure wht t ans you. I tell you no, & you started bcomin ego & stuffs & start w/ all ur previous acts. IDK y you juz seem t seek joy in insultin me/mockin @ me esp. whn I failed smth or whtsoever, I really DK. U've nvr really spared a thought for me, don't tell me you did cos it'd be utter bullshiat. Sometimes, you injure me so hard tht it hurts, I nvr breathed a word. Sometimes your insults get overboard, I nvr said a single thing, bcos I don't wanto be petty. Sometimes even if I keep quiet & mind my own business, you'd still faind faults w/ me, yet I juz keep'em t myself, keep all emotions t myself. Sometimes, th reason is YOU, yes YOU YOU YOU! You nvr realised, tht's all.
♥